Mind vs. Silent Presence
In meditation, there will frequently appear to be a battle between the chattering mind and silent presence. It often seems the distractions of the mind soon have you chasing a thought down a rabbit hole until you are hopelessly lost in thinking. Eventually, presence brings you back to silence and you sit there with a feeling of failing at meditation.
The problem is, you still identify yourself as the mind. You see the noisy mind as who you are and the silent presence as something you need to achieve in meditation. A breakthrough comes when there is a shift in your experience and you realize it is the silent presence which you are and it is the mind which is merely a fly buzzing around your experience. The mind can never take you away from silent presence because you are always that. You never have to achieve anything. When thoughts come, you choose not to identify with or resist them. You abide in the presence you are and allow the mind to do its dance. Like a fireworks display, you watch the thoughts arise, explode, and diminish into nothingness. You are the witness to the beginning and the end of all thoughts. This is true meditation.
The Heaviness of Ego
When you begin moving away from constantly living under the dictate of ego, you feel lighter, as if you have somehow shed inner weight. Then, during occasional episodes of falling back into the grip of ego energy, the sensation of heaviness returns and is startling. You wonder how you could have spent so much of your life living that way.
Human Relationships
All human relationships will involve a certain degree of dysfunction until the realization comes that there is no relationship between human beings. There is only one being. With that realization, all dysfunction dissolves.
The Body As A Garden
Treat the body exactly as a garden in which you have been given charge. Give it the necessary time, attention, and care to receive optimum return, yet never attach a personal identity to it. You would never confuse the garden with yourself. Similarly, never confuse the body with yourself. If you notice you are over-feeding or under-watering the garden, make the necessary adjustments, then let the garden be the garden. It will do what gardens do as they grow, sometimes as expected, other times producing surprising results. At times, it seems like we can influence the health and development of the garden, but ultimately, so much of the garden’s process is beyond our control and understanding, even in the garden’s demise, as it changes form and dissolves back into the earth from where it was never actually separate. This is the good and necessary process of gardens and bodies.
Time To Develop
Just as coming out of a completely dark room into a brightly lit room takes a time period of adjustment before one can see clearly, so does moving from unconsciousness to consciousness. The reality is, there is no person, no transformation, no passing of time. But on the human level, there is often the appearance of the passing of time before we can fully experience the depth and nuances of the awakened state. This is the illusion of spiritual novice and spiritual master.
Pokey LaFarge at Terminal West
I was fortunate to attend the Pokey LaFarge concert at Terminal West in Atlanta on December 6. I’ve been wanting to see him perform for awhile now and I wasn’t disappointed. You can always tell when an artist or band has been touring for years. Their shows are tight and solid. This was certainly the case with Pokey LaFarge. They played an enjoyable selection of oldies, recents and brand new tunes and there wasn’t a dud in the bunch.
When History Repeats
I’ve always had a perhaps deeper than normal interest in the subject of the Holocaust. It started in high school when my sociology teacher showed the television series “Holocaust” and the whole thing became a part of my soul. I’m not Jewish and I grew up knowing no one who was Jewish but for some reason I’ve always felt I was somehow connected to it. When I see photos of the prisoners in the camps, I always feel like I’m looking at my own family or even myself. Earlier this year, I went to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum in DC and it was an emotional, terrifying, sickening walk through an unbelievable but real event. I’m currently watching a Holocaust documentary on the National Geographic channel and it feels like this entire year, whenever I watch something about the Holocaust, I’m seeing an old map of current events. I feel a horrifying deja vu. I tell myself I’m probably just over reacting but then, daily, events seem to reflect way too closely the timeline leading to those events in Germany. Only this time, there will be no Americans to swoop in and save the day. Anyone else feel this impending doom? Can the course be turned?
Celebrate!
I was playing a game using Google Streetview where you get thrown into a random mystery location and you have to try to figure out where you are. I found myself in either Sri Lanka or Singapore (I can’t remember which) but eventually traveled past this guy who seemed doubly damned happy about something. Maybe he was just excited to be alive. Maybe he just turned his odometer over to 000000 and had to get out of his car and celebrate. Perhaps he was able to dump the body bag over the bridge all by himself. Whatever the case, he and I crossed virtual paths for a brief time and I share in his enthusiasm. You go dude!